Monday, June 16, 2008

buurry me smilin wif g's in my pocket

i am thinking about opening up my other blog again. sometimes i crave the raw, uncensored nakedness that semi-anonymity provides. i mean i can't very well go talking about washing my pickle box here because there are some folks out there that i know - that may even be related to me - that like to think of me like i like to think of Larry Appleton ; nice but annoying; respectable but but completely private-part-less. so i can't really talk about the complete benefits of mounting olympic grade still rings in the shower.

also i can't call my best friend a fucking uppity bitchface on here or she'll get pissed at me.

so i am left here, wanting to write, but not having anything to blog about except the baby possum we have that runs along the fence that we have adopted and named greg. he only comes out at night and doesn't stick around long and we are hoping it really is a baby possum. it would suck if greg wound up being a rat.

also, it is tu pac's birthday. in his honor, i will be replacing my ere sounds with urr sounds and my oo sounds with uh sounds and my th sounds with ff sounds. ex: that gentleman over thurr? he's somewhat of a dushbag and his breaf is also quite stinky. now you try. rock the pac.

12 Comments:

Blogger Sean said...

and tupac is still alive, but we've got to keep it on the dl cause of shug...

damn the man. i have to go back through my old favorites to see if i've got the link to the other blog. because if there's any kinda nudity, emotional or otherwise i wanna be able to point and laugh.

10:47 AM  
Blogger Crystal said...

sean -
T.he
H.ate
U.
G.ive

L.ittle
I.nfants
F.ucks
E.verybody

and that's all i have to say about that.


oh yeah, and also the picture of my thighs is saturated with elements of both sadness and hilarity. be prepared for an emotional roller coaster.

11:18 AM  
Blogger Eric said...

I very much miss the old blog...

11:30 AM  
Anonymous Pants said...

I can't speak for anyone else but your private parts are what brings me back.

11:54 AM  
Blogger Improgging Fool! said...

My best friend gets mad if I call her an uppity bitchface, too. Weird.

If you need blog fodder, stop by and improg with us!

blog + improv = improg!

1:46 PM  
Blogger tinyhands said...

If you can't find anything good to write about, you're not sleeping with enough interns. The noteable lack of content on my blog, as proof.

6:15 AM  
Blogger Chris Cope said...

I've gotten the same way about my blog, yo. Everyone I know reads it, which kind of makes it difficult for me to talk about how I want to punch so and so in the face and steal his girlfriend. Uhm. Hypothetically.

6:26 AM  
Blogger ThatGirl7278 said...

Me too!! But I shot myself in the foot by opening my damn mouth and saying "Hey everybody I have a blog. Check it out." years back. I blame it on my own selfish need to have daily readers. I definitely do a lot more self-censoring now tho. Oh well.

6:59 AM  
Blogger Anthony S. said...

Open up the floodgates! I want to hear more about the pickle box.

P.S. Larry Appleton you are not. Balki, maybe...

12:58 PM  
Blogger Crystal said...

sean - how do i even go about breaking into your site? this is totally unfair. booo, sean, boooo.

2:29 PM  
Blogger AmyO said...

I need an update on your pumpkin. Has it taken over your house?

12:16 PM  
Blogger Ruthie said...

But then won't you just end up telling everyone who you don't want to read it where it is anyway?

1:42 PM  

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