Wednesday, May 15, 2019

You like that, mat?

I have been working out for awhile now and my fitness mat is terribly funky.  It's dirty and falling apart and kind of smells like salty feet.  So I got a new mat the other day.  I was VERY excited about it.  I went down on it to do push ups and said, "Hi, sexy mat.  We are going to get so dirty together." and then I pretended to make out with it because my friend was next to me.  I kept on saying rude shit to it throughout the workout like, and such as, "You like that, mat?  There's more where that came from" and "You smell so good, mat, it's making me crazy" and "I'm sweating so bad.  Sorry, mat." etc.
Well, later that evening, I got a friend request from a guy.  I went to look at his pictures and realized he was the guy on the other side of me at the work out.  His name is Matt.  So........does this mean we are dating now?


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