i upset my boss last week and i thought he has hated me ever since. i thought today would be especially bad seeing as how i started off the day by killing my poor rice. i then had to stop by the store so that made me late to work. so my boss came into my office and handed me an envelope that said "strictly confidential" and smiles at me. this is the first smile i have received from him all week, mind you. i thought, 'oh, great! i am getting fired via letter and he is loving every second of it! what am i going to do?! Christmas is coming up and my boobie was misbehaving last month leaving me with medical bills that i can't afford, my car broke down, what else do you want from me???!!!! what else??? you may as well gouge my eyes out with a plastic spoon and talk distastefully about my mother while rubbing ceramic plates together and causing my unborn children to have testicular disfigurement and refracted cardio-pulmonary disease!!!'

but it was a raise.

i'm going shopping.