Kid Language

I use curse words. A lot. In fact, I realized the other day that since fuck, shit, dickhead, and asshat have become part of my vocabulary, I rarely use any creative discription. I was with my eight year old nephew and I wanted to tell him to "quit fucking with me!", but I would have been tattled on, and then gotten the not-in-front-of-the-kids lecture. In my state of frustration, I couldn't think of a word that had the same effect as "fucking" so I just sat there and let him keep fucking with me.

When his brother is fucking with him, he will say something to the effect of "Fart on you, Alex. I don't even give a care!" This would not be an effective way for me to express myself in the adult world. Although, I am still reminded on a daily basis when I see a particular girl in the office, "She thinks she's hot snot on a silver platter, but she's really just a cold booger on a paper plate." How do kids come up with these things?? I mean, hot snot on a silver platter? That is much more descriptive than, "She thinks her shit don't stink." I would much rather think about her snot than her shit. And thinking of her as a cold booger really warms me heart. Dammit.