Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Dating Tips for Men (#4)

Dating Tip #4 – Body Hair

I can’t vouch for all women on this one, but I know what I like.

DON’T shave your legs, unless you are participating in the Tour de France and actually have a shot at winning. It feels hurty and makes you look creepy.

DON’T shave your chest. Come on. Be a man. Why do you want to look like a boy? The first time I touched a hairy chest, I will admit that I was a little afraid, but after I got to KNOW the hairy chest, it became my friend. My very sexy friend that constantly reminded me of what a MAN I was with.

DON’T shave your arms. That’s just weird.

DO purchase a Shave Everywhere. That is a deal-breaker. Just do it. Seriously. Do it.

DO wax your eyebrows. Don’t overdo it. Just get the patch of hair in the middle. We don’t need arches, ok? You are not allowed to look better than us.

DO wax the back hair. Some back hair is acceptable, but if it is long enough to get stuck in my teeth, it needs to go. Besides, you can more easily feel my fingernails across your back that way.

6 Comments:

Blogger Scott said...

The shave everywhere is a brilliant product. I have had mine for a few months and it is a great thing.

Scott

10:40 AM  
Blogger The Grunt said...

I'm really fortunate. God gave me the right amount of hair in all the right places. My eybrows look groomed, but I need not do a thing. My chest and abdomen are just hairy enough, Not one hair on my back or ass.

Thanks God.

11:24 AM  
Blogger Clearlykels said...

I agree. Also, yay for the grunt not having ass hair. That is another place that not having hair is good.

11:47 AM  
Blogger markis said...

hahahahaha

1:20 PM  
Blogger NiolK said...

That fucking shaveverywhere ad is the funniest fuckin thing. I gotta get me one of them.

2:26 PM  
Blogger ekki said...

Yeah, if you have a hairy ass, you might have to stay single. Actually I dated a guy with a hairy ass and it wasn't pretty.

8:00 PM  

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