Thursday, February 01, 2007

Everything that you could never say would never matter anyway

I am in a foul mood. I think it has something to do with all this mother-fucking rain. I am sick of it!

I had a meeting this morning that I thought was going to be boring so I took a NoDoz and washed it down with 4 cups of coffee because it seemed like a good idea at the time. I was not bored at all. In fact, I kept bobbing my head to the drum solo from In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida that was looping in my brain and occasionally blurting out random facts about residual chlorine levels and the export of the goddamn gaseous hydrocarbons (two subjects I know absolutely nothing about). I’ve decided that during these meetings I can either fall asleep or act like an epileptic with Tourette Syndrome. Always in search of a happy medium – the story of my life.

Anyway, I am never meaner than when I am coming down from a caffeine high. It’s not pretty. I get a headache and spit callously in the faces of innocent children and old people and hope that my saliva contains some type of flesh-eating acid. Don’t worry. They deserve it.

I had fun last night. The boy and I went bowling with Jamie and Dave. I kicked ass in the first game…surprisingly. I am never good at bowling. I get nervous that people are looking at my butt. Dave even took a picture of it for me. The score - not my butt. Dirty.


Blogger Anthony S. said...

I clicked on the link before I realized that you said score, not butt. My loss.

I know this doesn't matter, but you don't suck. Fuck those little bastards (children). You had every right to kick dirt in their face; they're bastards, after all.

11:31 PM  
Blogger Chris Cope said...

I, too, eagerly clicked the link before reading that it was a picture of the score. Ah well, at least it appears that you won. We love Crystal, yes we do. We love Crystal, how 'bout you?

2:09 AM  
Blogger goldennib said...

There's nothing worse than caffine mean. I thought we were seeing your butt, too.

2:48 AM  
Blogger Neal said...

I threw three X's in a row the other night for my bowling trip, though my picture didn't turn out well enough to make my blog.

4:54 AM  
Blogger tinyhands said...

That's funny! I mean, how could you know anything about residual chlorine or gaseous hydrocarbons? You're just a girl!

6:26 AM  
Blogger Clearlykels said...

I am a horrible bowler. I just have fun and don't worry about the score. Luckily, I am not competitive.

Ugh! Coming down from a caffeine high is the worst-- which is why I usually just have to completely avoid it.

6:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You rock the party at bowling. I think you should quit your job and start "professional" bowling. You would at least be the cutest bowler in the league :)

6:39 AM  
Blogger biffm said...

I don't bowl, but two people at 100 points and one at 45 points??? Do they ride the short bus?

1:42 PM  
Blogger Thomas said...

No rain up here in Seattle. Did y'all steal our rain?

2:05 PM  
Blogger Photogirl said...

People still go bowling?

9:15 PM  
Blogger Blur said...

What self respecting men would lose to a girl in bowling? The men in your life need to sack up.

6:02 PM  
Blogger Big Primpin' said...

I agree with Blur. The men in your life do indeed need to sack up. Taking a picture of your butt will be a fine start.

7:05 AM  

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