Strip Gin Rummy and Naked Jumping Jacks

It was a good weekend.

I also got the chance to see The Chronic-what!-cles of Narnia. That movie kicks ass. I want a lion.

So I was sitting around with him this weekend when I suddenly became very bored…with myself. I hadn’t spoken in almost an hour and my stagnation on his couch caused me to start growing mosquitoes.

Did you know that I used to be fun? I was a fun fucking girlfriend. I would go to great lengths to make kick-ass dates. Now I am boring. All I ever feel like doing is watching movies and washing dishes. Poor guy. So Saturday night, fed up with myself and the smell of mildew that was starting to emanate from my pits, I jumped from the couch, declared I’d be having wine and that we’d be playing cards. It’s all I could come up with on short notice and I wound up having more fun with him that night than I’d had in a very long time. He is pretty good at following through with his bets as long as they don’t involve ballerina dance moves or dressing up like a princess and speaking in an English lady voice for the rest of the evening.

So I have decided to get back to being more exciting to hang out with than a used toothpick.

Any suggestions?